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Mongoose

by The 2 Twangs

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1.
Ask your mom Ask your dad They’re gonna tell you all the fun that they had Ask your brother Ask your wife They’re gonna tell you it’s the time of your life Take some cheese Take some wine Find a pot to heat and start to combine Add some nutmeg Garlic’s good Now you’re ready to dip in some bread We’re having fondue for two Fondue for two It’s the best you ever knew You’re having fondue for two Got a simple Yet refined Informal get together on my mind Use a fountain Use an urn Use proper caution so you don’t get burned Cincinnati New Rochelle I got some recipes to ring your bell Bring a healthy Appetite And ingredients to last all night
2.
Don’t need no Buf Puf Single with Fostex I’m breakin’ out the Nynex to fill up my Rolodex (Hangin’ solo?) No man, I’m bee-linin’ to the queen of the roller rink Like it’s Riverside and I’m on the Cyclone (Woah!) Shift Manager says “turn your keys in” It’s like tryin’ to reason with Buddy Hinton and the Snack Shop fiend He’ll get the Mongoose cleaned Rolly got a little Rolly got a little Rolly got a little loan Where’s Annalisa? Anybody seen Brie? (She was kickin’ bricks off the corner of that Dunkin D) Really!? While I’m hikin’ the median strip on Rte. 9 E?? Oh (Oh) C’mon (C’mon) Everybody just gonna play jai alai like it’s the Miami Vice theme? Well anyhow I’m sure we shook them Shysters on the green When we split that scene Rolly got a little Rolly got a little Rolly got a little loan You want lost and found? (Ask around) Saw you headin’ southbound (Come on down) You gonna kiss the ground? (Not in this town) You gotta hover! Orlando or Lando Jed Stott
3.
The Riff 04:28
Tryin’ out a Fender Twin I had my Les Paul plugged in My brother BB, he was there I played a thing with triplets BB said “Hey that was cool. Can you play that again?” And so I did and he said “Dude, You should write a song with that.” But I don’t know if there’s a song for the riff Tried it in mixolydian And then a minor version BB filmed it with his phone Sent it to our buddy, Taz Taz texted back a curt message With only one word, “garbage” He might be trollin’ but still right Some riffs weren’t meant to see the light And I don’t know if there’s a song for the riff
4.
My Speculoos 02:52
It’s been a long, long day I’m heading home I spent the afternoon out on the road Boss was yelling, screaming in my ear You’ve got to meet sales forecasts for the year But when I get back home I open up my eyes I reach for bread and then I shun the curly fries Just a minute now to crispen up the snack Melting butter and I add a sweet attack My Speculoos At the same stoplight since six o’clock The color’s changing but the traffic’s stopped I GPS the closest Trader Joe’s And hit the breakdown lane cause green means go When I get there I run past the sample trays I scan the aisles ’til my eyes begin to glaze A sign says “out of stock” I can’t hold back my shriek The grocery clerk says it might be another week for My Speculoos Did you look in the back? Just double-check I need it (Come on boys and girls, now listen everybody Do you love rock and roll or have you left the party?) When life’s a dodge ball pegging me between the eyes I give myself this one participation prize I’m gonna stock the fallout shelter in my yard With just a spoon and six or seven hundred jars of My Speculoos
5.
Oh, are you ready? Gonna tell you ‘bout this woman Gonna verbally process some unresolved feelings First step toward a constructive conversation She was productive all mornin’ long The Good Will pile was risin’ by the cellar door Clearin’ the high shelves, affixin’ labels You know she likes to keep those bins up off the floor And she said “Come inspect my progress” as she pulled back her hair Poured myself an OJ, followed her down the stairs She threw the legos away She threw the legos away She threw the legos away She threw the legos away Well I looked in the cabinets My head went hot She leaned back smiling with one foot against the wall I said “Where are the legos?” She said “Did you still want those? I took them to the transfer station in DePaul.” And I said “Well okay I just thought I guess um no that’s cool Think I’ll head out back and maybe clean out the pool” She threw the legos away She threw the legos away She threw the legos away She threw the legos away I mean, all I’m saying... I mean you put those things on Ebay You could get a lot She threw the legos away She threw the legos away She threw the legos away She threw the legos away And now I’m rockin’ out
6.
Sneak Attack 01:39
Rail slides outside of the DQ Ollies high over the curbs Took the boom box, adjusted the EQ Then outta nowhere, came the greasy scourge Of the burbs Like a freight train In the middle lane I was a blood stain Sneak Attack! Makin’ dirt bike skids on the driveway Poppin’ wheelies on Coolia’s lawn We took the woods onto the highway The ground was shakin’ baby She was headin’ straight on With her throng Like a freight train In the middle lane I was a blood stain Sneak Attack! Close your eyes Block your ears Run and hide Heed your fears Penny rides Neil’s not near Nigh she flies Now she’s here She got the shears! It was a freight train In the middle lane I was a blood stain It was a Sneak Attack!
7.
(transcribed from improvised lyrics) So I went on a… on my birthday Walkin’ down the street to see some guys And I notice over all the commotion Two guys comin’ down the place And I… (Rain in the fire’s on your shoal) And all over all my cause (Night of the shadows was your lawn) And I don’t know first for certain (And the certain times are gone) Will I get out of this night (Get out of this night now) Only ninjas can fight these guys Only ninjas can fight these guys They’re not the trolls from last week Only ninjas can fight these guys Only ninjas can fight these guys Only ninjas can fight these guys They aren’t the trolls from last week Only ninjas can fight these guys So I went down to the parking lot And I saw four more other guys They came at me from all corners Jumpin’ over all the things And I saw now they were a-runnin’ (When in the lies your shoes are fie) And I saw like five more guys (Tough guys are walkin’ for the wall) And I didn’t know for certain (And the winter’s fire will call) If this fight was gonna fly (Time for the higher show now)
8.
Lonely Friday evening Roaming Fun and Games A glow air hockey table Spoke my name Suddenly a vision Reflected in the puck A doorway in the ceiling Opened up Voices from above Sang “Hey, son” You gotta drive back to Rudy’s Before the day is done, for a Combo Plate #1 (Drive back to Rudy’s) For a little fun And a Combo Plate # 1 Woke up Saturday morning Drove up to your town There was nothing for me to do there But circle around Played your Donovan mixtape Gave myself the blues Pulled into the left lane Set the cruise Knew just what to do To forget you Said I’m gonna drive back to Rudy’s Get a table in the sun, and a Combo Plate #1 (Drive back to Rudy’s) For a little fun And a Combo Plate # 1 Side of queso Dos Equis please A las tres I’ll order me another one of these Gotta drive back to Rudy’s Before the day is done For a Combo Plate # 1 Get yourself, get yourself that platter Nothin’ else, nothin’ else gonna matter Order up one combination platter tonight You can kneel if your life is broken You can steal if you’ve spent your tokens But this deal, it’s for real I understand about whatever you feel But c’mon down to Somerville Maybe we can split the bill If you drive back to Rudy’s Before the day is done For a Combo Plate #1 (Drive back to Rudy’s) For a little fun And a Combo Plate #1 Uno es triste Dos es mejor No digas que hemos terminado mi amor Just drive back to Rudy’s You’re the only one (I’d let sample my) Combo Plate #1
9.
Loggin’ out of the digital jabber Pluggin’ in to your Crybaby Wah Your Marshall head, you gotta rehab her Your Rickenbacker needs a humbucker but You gotta rock like Galaga Dude Riffin’ on a minor scale Swiggin’ on a Mountain Dew Triggerin’ a primal wail It’s still alright to rock ‘n’ roll I got my wheels out, I’m rockin’ the lows It’s still alright to rock ‘n’ roll Go rock ‘n roll, get your soul from the fires of old You’re hittin’ 278 in your ‘70 big block Cowl induction kickin’ in on the hood ‘Til you slam on the brakes for Laguardia gridlock Just roll the window down and crank up Johnny B. Goode Cause ya gotta rock like Canada Sue Chuggin’ down a shamrock shake You got about 22 seconds ‘til an instrumental groove So better make your Motorola quake It’s still alright to rock ‘n roll It’s still alright to rock ‘n roll You got the right to rock ‘n roll It’s only right to rock ‘n roll Go rock ‘n roll, get your soul from the fires
10.
Cantilever 03:07
Cantilever In the shadows of fields unknown Cool deceiver With your Squire and Epiphone Misconceiver Cantilever In Geneva tonight You go and wreck your head in the fire zone Goin’ up down turn around upon your throne And when you feel like you left your right And dream about it every night Cantilever all alone Sunny Gummi That’s what I’m callin’ you from now on Your Jolt Rummy Got you singin’ your own theme song I find it funny Sunny Gummi Yeah I think it’s funny tonight You go and wreck your head in the fire zone Goin’ up down turn around upon your throne And when you feel like you left your right And dream about it every night Cantilever all alone On the skyrail of your mind To the fever in your heart Cantilever when you fall apart, fall apart Fall apart, fall apart, I got a crane Glory winner Always making your high score up Story thinner Than the lid of a Hoodsie Cup Record spinner Glory winner Play beginner tonight You go and wreck your head in the fire zone (Drop, shimmy along to Top Jimmy) Goin’ up down turn around upon your throne And when you feel like you left your right And dream about it every night Cantilever all alone
11.
Took a walk With Sallie Mae She told ya sonny you got bills to pay, you said You would if you could, but you won’t cause you can’t stop rockin’ Your mom says cool it but you can’t stop rockin’ tonight Shine your groove Shine your groove Shine your groove Refine your groove Shine your groove Redefine your groove Shine your groove Realign your groove
12.
I got a feelin’ Yeah a feelin’, (It’s kinda) Hard to describe I stare up at the ceilin’ Everything starts reelin’ Like it’s MTV in ‘85 (I start singin’) On the street, people lookin’ for somethin’ real Everybody yeah rock yeah somethin’ wheel From the rebel kids dancin’ in the dark To the old folks romancin’ in the park Never doin’ what they’re told The record needle’s in the groove, and so’s this town And every fume that I’m breathin’ and every sound Feels like rock ‘n’ roll Out in the city It ain’t pretty You gotta watch out for life So I’m hittin’ the highway Goin’ my way Straight across the bridge to Chorus Drive (Where choirs of hair bands sing) You gotta run when you’re facin’ the loaded gun But the battle’s never won ‘til you reach the midnight sun All you saints and sinners on down the line All you paints and thinners such as turpentine Rock’s the shelf which will you hold Cause I turn on the radio and hear a crappy song Some loser rippin’ off Skynyrd and Zevon but tonight It feels like rock ‘n’ roll Jackhammer like a solo on the drums Heartburn resulting from some wings I ate for lunch Like a fire in my soul Whatever it is I think I see Becomes a spinnin’ LP to me, even that tree Feels like rock ‘n’ roll You need to read but your heart it starts to bleed And then it speeds like a steed that you must heed When the rhythm takes control Jayne feels the pain and she’s runnin’ in the rain She’s insane but our love is not in vain Cause tonight, it feels like rock ‘n’ roll
13.
I think my cousin Roomed with him Junior year at Calvin His father pastored That church in Glenn Where we went to Chuck and Lisa’s wedding, yeah A Dutch connection A Dutch connection Everyone remembers on further reflection Dutch Connection A Dutch Connection Everybody’s pretty sure that they remember that guy Remember Biertsma’s daughter Brit? Worked at Culver Christian Didn’t she date him for a bit? Must have been ‘07 or ‘08 or around then A Dutch connection A Dutch connection Everyone remembers on further reflection Dutch Connection A Dutch Connection Everybody’s pretty sure that they remember that guy Coast to coast, Lynden to Whitinsville Folks are vaguely remembering a guy named Phil As he comes up in conversation briefly at the table
14.
Light fades Evening is caving in I feel the pangs Of losses resurfacing The emptiness looms like a duck that has lost its quack I stare in the face of a post-twilight hunger attack Looking through the fridge Looking through the pantry to find myself There is a space in the freezer with no gallon on the shelf Gone is the brand that could reach out and love me most So I open a packet and raise up the last sugar toast Church Street is still Ahead I can see the spot I pass Dolphin 2 And cross through the parking lot Through the glass the suggestion box still hanging on the wall Of an emptied out storefront in Town Plaza Shopping Mall Looking through the fridge Looking through the pantry to find myself There is a space in the freezer with no gallon on the shelf Gone is the brand that could reach out and love me most So I open a packet and raise up the last sugar toast Where is Hank? Is Crystal really gone? Who will come to get my order wrong? Looking through the fridge Looking through the pantry to find myself There is a space in the freezer with no gallon on the shelf Gone is the brand that could reach out and love me most So I open a packet and raise up the last sugar toast Fishamajig Jim Dandy sundae I wish you well I would accept any flavor to pair with my Magic Shell Your franchise still haunts this intersection like a ghost Goodbye to Friendly’s Here I stand raising my last sugar toast
15.
Another early morning agony Got a shift from 8:00am to 3:00 But today is different than the rest I’m moving up to the big leagues now My situation’s been redressed Time to get my goggles on Time to plan when I’ll be gone Time to train the new guy, Ron I’m finally gettin’ outta here No more bagging to stand in my way No more coupons to ruin my day I’m moving up to H-B-A I’m finally gettin’ outta here Now I’m whipping hang tags down the aisle Stocking Degree and Mitchum for a while I’ve got a pricing gun for Colgate on the shelf Get out of my way, it’s a brand new day I’m like a freaking H-B-A elf Time to get my goggles on Time to plan when I’ll be gone Time to train the new guy, Ron I’m finally gettin’ outta here No more bagging to stand in my way No more coupons to ruin my day I’m moving up to H-B-A I’m finally gettin’ outta here Time to get my goggles on Time to plan when I’ll be gone Time to train the new guy, Ron I’m finally gettin’ outta here No more bagging to stand in my way No more coupons to ruin my day I’m moving up to H-B-A I’m finally gettin’ outta here Time to make this job foregone Time to tell the cashiers so long Time to sing this farewell song I’m finally gettin’ outta here No more work for minimum pay No more working New Year’s day Hello to H-B-A I’m finally gettin’ outta here

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released June 7, 2019

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The 2 Twangs Southborough, Massachusetts

The 2 Twangs are Reich Neffcopp and Morter Farmbo. Their newest album Mongoose features a more adrenalized collection of songs than we’ve heard from the duo since they first pressed “record” on the boombox in Morter’s basement 30 years ago.

Check out The 2 Twangs youtube channel to hear more of their music. Subscribe to receive updates as they add previous albums and new videos.
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